Sunday, June 20, 2010

How Can We Change Negative Self Talk


Self-talk habit definitely is one that's colored our thinking for years and can affect us in many ways. However, any time is a good time to change it. Here are some ways how we can stop from using negative self-talk and boost our productivity and self-esteem.

Notice Your Patterns first :
Become more aware of the problem. We probably don't realize how often we say negative things in our head and even worse, we don't realize how much it affects our experience.
  • Journal Writing - jot down every negative comments when we think about them and summarize about them. At the end of the day, go back to analyze for it and think about it back. Journaling can be effective tool for examining our inner process.
  • Thought-Stopping : As we notice ourself saying something negative in mind, we can stop it by saying "stop!". Saying this aloud will be powerful insya ALLAH and having to say it aloud will make us more aware of how many times we are stopping negative thoughts.
  • Rubber-Band Snap : Put a rubber band around your wrist. As you notice negative self-talk, pull the band away from your skin and let it snap back :D Wahahaha....wonder who among us will deny to admit that we have the negative self talk with this idea. But guess what, if we try this really hard, insya ALLAH the negative self talk won't let us in streaa anymore.
Replace Negative Statements :
Yes, we have to replace it with something better. Maybe this will help us :

  • Milder Wording : In your self-talk, turning more powerful negative words to more neutral ones can actually help neutralize your experience. Instead of using words like 'hate' and 'angry', you can use words like 'don't like' and 'annoyed'. Sounds much milder, doesn't it?
  • Change negative to neutral or positive : As you find yourself mentally complaining about something, rethink your assumptions. Are you assuming something is a negative event when it isn't, necessarily?
  • Change Self-Limiting Statements to Questions : self=limiting statement like "I can't handle this!" or "This is impossible!" are particularly damaging because they increase your stress in a given situation and they stop you from searching for solutions. The next time you find yourself thinking something that limits possibilities of a given situation, turn it into a question. Doesn't "How can I handle this?" or "How is this possible?" sound more hopeful and open up your imagination to new possibilities?